Once upon a time there was a mom, a mom-to-be. She was very blessed and was given LOTS of clothes for her new baby, some new, some used but looked new, and TONS of used that looked used - for "play clothes." This mom was raised in the country, down a dirt road, and she had 4 brothers, she knew "play clothes" were needed once a child was mobile, but what would an infant need them for? And the clothes were so tiny, it would take FOREVER to have a full load. She folded (folded? - what's that, too long long ago to remember) them and put them in drawers awaiting the sweet little child who would wear some of them (a baby could never need ALL of them).
She soon discovered, infants NEED "play clothes," and they can create FULL loads of laundry in a couple of days (think bedding, quilts, car seat covers, in addition to those bitty little outfits). From the moment they are born, babies have something coming out of them nearly 24 hours a day, and they wiggle and grab at things and knock things over (like a bowl of soup or cereal which his hungry mommy is trying to eat while nursing him). The play clothes are needed for any hours of the day when the baby is not being shown off in the new cute stuff (the new cute stuff becomes play clothes as soon as it has been "christened" with one form of body fluid or another). Tired exhausted moms of sweet little non-stop fluid producing babies are too tired to keep up with laundry, especially if she has to haul it and children to a laundromat or a kind relative's house. And piles, several FULL loads of laundry worth, grow and grow. Maybe there should be a section in the baby books for that too - baby's growth chart and laundry pile's growth chart.
Later, this mom was blessed with 3 more babies and thankfully, she continued to be blessed from one relative or friend or acquaintance or another with hand-me-downs. And she got very good at finding thrift stores and yard sales and clearance racks (which is also how she kept up her Little Tikes toys addiction for years). This mom learned and sought out tips on how to deal with body fluid "christened" clothes (think Dawn) and later, outside nature and food and even Sharpie ink "christened" clothes (think Shout and/or hairspray). As the babies grew and grew and GREW, this mom became a laundry Nazi because the sheer amount of laundry was enough to make anyone go insane and because she had to constantly keep up with what fit, what didn't, finding bigger sizes, having enough clean unstained, unripped clothes that fit each of them. And because these darling precious babies grew to be darling precious children who thought nothing of mud, food, ink, or worse - changing their outfits several times a day, or THE WORST - not getting clean clothes put away or dropping clean clothes on the ground and then in the process of cleaning up they (it's almost too horrific to say, sit down if you're standing) they scoop up and shove clean clothes IN the laundry hamper with all the smelly filthy dirty clothes. (I know, you're in shock - the HORROR of doing the laundry and coming across a shirt/blanket/pair of pants/towel still somewhat folded, obviously NOT worn/used since it was last washed, IN the dirty clothes hamper, and it's too late, it stinks, it may even be damp from being next to a used towel or a sweaty basketball jersey, it has to be washed AGAIN - oh the time, the hot water, the soap, the electricity, the waste! now imagine finding several things like that, EACH time you do laundry, and continuing to find them for the next several years with no sign of stopping!)
Okay, I'm calm again, I think I can go on...
This same mom, when she had only 2 small children who were nearly school age, had a friend who's oldest had just started school. This friend's child's school had a dress code, not quite a uniform, but a strict dress code. At first, this mom, who used to be a teenager, thought that was horrible, but as she thought about how simple that made a parent's life, and the positive aspects it would have on the kids' lives, she decided she liked it. She created a "dress code" for their family. She had seen styles change in her lifetime and seen some inappropriate things become popular. The new fashion at the time when she first created their dress code was wearing pants way too big, without a belt, practically falling off and underwear showing (yes, on purpose, underwear showing). This mom had also heard in talks and speeches and classes that you behave differently in different places, with different groups of people and when dressed in different ways. For instance, slouching in weekend jammies isn't appropriate to wear to work in an office, and a church-raised young man in a nice stirt and tie will hopefully remember to be a perfect gentleman while on a date with a church-raised young woman wearing a modest dress who will hopefully remember to be a perfect lady. This mom knew children (and grown-ups) needed both relaxing casual times and serious get work done times but did not want ANY rude inappropriate times, so she attempted to provide for that in their dress code. This (and Family Nights and Sunday School lessons and the stories/movies they hear/watch about being kind and helpful and respectful) must have worked because people are always telling her how respectful and helpful and hard working her children are.
This mom knows she was overly strict on some things which wouldn't really matter but she wanted life to be simple and to avoid ANY nit-picky border line problems in clothes or styles. Her dress code's main purpose was to avoid clothes/styles which were inappropriate and it's second purpose was to simplify her life. This mom has no natural fashion sense, does not "get" most of the trendy styles and can't figure out what others see in them, can not figure out what is or is not someone's "season," has a difficult time choosing outfits and prefers shirts and pants that come together or just always wearing jeans because jeans go with everything (right?), and she has a hard time knowing if certain colors will "blend" (but she can tell if they definitely don't blend). And this mom has all the above mentioned laundry issues so she wanted life simple, so she could focus on more important things, like her darling precious children.
Those children grew and grew and GREW. For a while, they had hand-me downs from the friends who had the original school dress code (which was more strict than our story's mom's was, so clothes from that family were appropriate) but the families moved far apart from each other. This mom found lots of clothes, pretty cheap, that fit her code and her children would wear them. She found herself doing something her mother did (which she swore she'd never do but discovered it made life mach easier), when she found something that worked (fit her code, fit her child, fit her budget) she just got several of the same thing, maybe different colors, but the same thing.
It has been over 10 years since she started her family dress code and there have been a few problems and recently she's running into big problems. One of the rules is on hem lengths. When the kids are young (Kindergarten and younger) and growing SO fast, she wasn't strict on it, and wasn't strict on the "no ripped clothes to school or church" rule because EVERY pair of pants a 3 or 4 year old boy owns has at least one ripped knee including his Sunday slacks, and all the bums are threadbare ready to rip any moment. She wanted the dress code rules to be firm when the kids hit teenage-hood, so she started them very young so there would be no arguing by the time they hit teenage-hood. She tried to plan and be flexible for whatever style changes may pop up over time. Because she tends to get several of the same thing and nothing else, her kids, some of whom share her loathing of change, can't handle it when no more of that exact type of clothing exist, because the child outgrew them all and the mean clothing designers and stores have switched to a new style. Or the child grows out of kids' sizes and into adult sizes and what they want is not available in adult sizes. Similar problem with shoes, this mom and her kids have large feet and she has 3 children who are in adult size shoes now.
This mom has been searching all over for men's size "cargo" jeans (with the big pockets on the side) and has cleaned out her town of any pair under $15 (an outrageously high price for any one clothing item). Her darling precious taller then her now son is ONLY willing to wear full length, somewhat baggy, but can stay on well WITHOUT a belt, darker colored blue jeans with big close-able pockets on the sides, and sometimes shorts which must be fairly baggy but again, not need a belt, which also have the big side pockets and MUST come past his knees. All of her son's requirements work with her dress code, this type of pants and shorts has been easily available for years and she hasn't had to spend much on them. Taking this son shopping to try them on is another story so she'd get a few sizes and he'd try them on at home - if too small, his brother got them, if too big, they just went in storage until they fit. But apparently men don't wear this style and this mom can't find it in the size he needs now, so her son continues to wear the threadbare getting too small pairs he has now. This mom is very worried each time she washes them and each time he wears them, that they will fall apart and he will refuse to wear anything. And today, he ripped the bum of his best, least worn out pair on a fence!
This mom's daughter is growing SO fast that she can't keep up with removing the shirts and skirts which are too short and replacing them with ones that are long enough. Fortunately, her daughter has been blessed with a recent abundance of hand-me-downs from other girls who's moms do not let their daughters wear skimpy clothes so it's just a matter of keeping up with her daughter's rapid growth spurts to keep her midriff and thighs covered. She has been blessed throughout her short life that each time her supply of "clothes to grow into" is about used up, someone shows up with a bag of cute modest hand-me-downs in the next size up. This is really a blessing for her because her mom would probably just have her wear her brother's clothes. (I can hear my sister and sisters-in-law gasping in horror at the thought).
So what brings all this up, besides the ripped bum in the best pair of pants, is that this mom's youngest spewed forth fluids this morning, the laundry piles are enormous, she feels like she's sinking and she needs a laugh at herself moment, and writing helps her find the silver lining, and she's waiting for the washer to finish so she can put the stuff in the dryer. Happy laundry to all and to all a good night.
